>>3991 (OP)
Fucking an umbrella doesn't count as fornication. She's an object. When you fuck an onahole, it's masturbation and doesn't count as sex, right? So why would an umbrella be any different?
But to answer the question, yes, I am very serious about wanting to experience the only rimjob in Gensokyo that can beat getting tonguefucked by Suwako.