>>4606
Seeing the board in its current state is definitely strange. I come every once in a while to see how the site is doing. It's hard to put into words. It's not dead, but I can really say it's alive either. In a way, it reminds of my grandparents and how they would get sad when a distant relative, or friend of the family, they hadn't seen in years would die; I never really understood why it was such a strong emotion until very recently. It feels like there are less in the world who get "it". I imagine that for my grandpa hearing the passing of someone who shared his vision of the world, and lived through similar experiences, must have been heartbreaking even if he only knew that person superficially.
On the topic of the meaning of my life, I always knew that I was going to have a life different from the rest of people. The prospect of living an unusual life never really bothered me. However, I do have something that has been bothering these past few years. Having the benefit of being able to read back my plans from the posts that I'd made years before, I feel as if I've made no progress whatsoever towards my goals; in a sense I feel like I've regressed on some things. Even then, a very small part of me refuses to give up and makes me feel like a good future is still possible. I don't know what the future might hold for me, I still show small glimpses of greatness sometimes, so who knows, maybe something intere