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it's fucking video games, baby


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NEW >>>/a/ REPEAT REPEAT NEW >>>/a/

Regarding recent events: >>>/meta/4978 

READ THE RULES


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SLEEPY STATION #8 OUT NOW
https://files.catbox.moe/i6ddl2.zip

SLEEPY STATION #9 COOKING ITT
Planned release date: Q1 2025

ISSUES
#1: https://files.catbox.moe/p9ivcb.zip
#2: https://files.catbox.moe/85kj7n.zip
#3: https://files.catbox.moe/bgkd2g.zip
#4: https://files.catbox.moe/bosv0h.zip
#5: https://files.catbox.moe/plzavp.zip
#6: https://files.catbox.moe/szw3sc.zip
#7: https://files.catbox.moe/09ke9b.zip
#8: https://files.catbox.moe/i6ddl2.zip

FAQ
>What is this?
Sleepy Station is a quarterly e-magazine by anons for anons, made in the spirit of 1990s-2000s gaming magazines back when fun was still allowed.
>Can I contribute?
Of course! Write an article/review about a game you love, a top 10 list, an amusing ad, a comic or art piece, a rant...etc and post it in this thread.
>How do I create an article?
 1. Download Scribus 1.6.x: https://sf.net/projects/scribus/files/scribus/
 2. Download the article template: https://files.catbox.moe/ty9iny.zip
 3. Read the guide provided with the template and watch the videos below.
 4. Start writing! You can share your progress any time by uploading your work folder to the thread.
>How do I create an ad?
Either use the Scribus template above or this GIMP template: https://files.catbox.moe/ryn2zl.xcf (also works with Krita!)

NOTE
Articles must be in Scribus SLA format, this allows the editor to properly merge articles and correct errors.
Ads, comics, and art can be in any format.

Remember: Have FUN

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Previous threads:
https://archive.today/x16VB
https://archive.today/Y4mVv
https://archive.today/rqkE6
https://archive.today/EWy7O
https://archive.today/ztMjE
https://archive.today/C3EdG
https://archive.today/oOXla
https://archive.today/FTylQ
https://archive.today/p3RGh
https://archive.today/7nv6Q
Replies: >>268836 >>275257
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Current status for issue #9

Done
>cover (pic related, might make some minor edits later)
>stranded ii article
>gravity rush article
>rad dude comic (4 panels)
>gondola cards

Done(?) but no SLA
>steam demos article
>oneechanbara article

WIP
>gameboy homebrew article
>pseudoregalia article (adapted from the indiepshit thread)

Unknown
>trepang 2 article (only text was posted)
>gamestoop ad (not sure if finished, no SLA was posted)

As you can see there are currently no (completed) ads for this issue. If you wanna try making one or simply have an idea worth sharing, your contribution will be much appreciated.
Replies: >>266230
>>266063
Damn buddy you done gave me an idea. Since I travel a lot I might be able to review actual (not chain dave & busters-like) arcades. 

Since this idea has only just now come to me I'm gonna spit out some things to rate 

1) number of games
2) pinball:vidya ratio
3) quality of selection
4) quality of hardware (does button, screen, stick work)
5) clientele (regulars, tourists, casuals, srs, willingness to play with strangers, willingness to leave you the fuck alone)
6) staff
7) atmosphere
8) non-pinball/arcade options (if any, pricing + quantity + quality) 
9) food/drink (if any, pricing + variety + quality)

I would appreciate any suggestions and feedback on this. I'll be in Tucson this weekend, I'll look to see if there's any arcades there.
Replies: >>266114 >>266129
>>266107
If you write it editor anon will publish it.
>Tucson
I think there's a Round 1 in the area, and the Electric Bat in Tempe but that's specifically a pinball arcade.
Replies: >>266129 >>266135
>>266107
>>266114
>If you write it editor anon will publish it.
Yep.
>I would appreciate any suggestions
Take a small notebook for jotting down your thoughts while visiting like a real journalist :^) and take lots of photos. Avoid sharing identifying information about the players or staff, out of respect. Most importantly though have fun.
Replies: >>266135
>>266129
>>266114
10-4 buddys
>Round 1
My primary focus is definitely on places that are primarily arcades, but if I'm shit outta luck on those a bowling alley is a possibly great option.
>pinball exclusive place
Those are cool but I know jack shit about pinball other than its fun. In Seattle theyused to? have a free little zineish kinda thing that keeps track of all the open pinball places in the city.
>notepad, pictures
I already have a few notepads that i need to put to use, and I intend to take pictures for the article for sure.
I've also come up with another criteria for the review, which is basically "how far/much fun does $5 get me", and I think a good follow up to that would be "how badly do I want to stay and burn more quarters after the initial $5 is gone"
Turns out I will not be in Tucson, and to spare the thread from more lies I won't say where I'll be, but it should be a city with at least one arcade. or bowling alley with games ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯
Replies: >>266146
>>266135
Round 1 in the US isn't really known for bowling so much as JP arcade games. It's the US branch of a Japanese company and the US locations are where they send titles that have stopped earning (or will be abandoned by the maker) to die. It's one of the few places you can reliably find Gitadora, bemani, the three or so drum type games, etc. and the only place where you can officially use most forms of Amusement IC outside of Japan. Unless you're at one of the three locations that has SpoCha everything else (except those seasoned fries that come in the shaker bags) is more like a bonus.
Replies: >>266508
>>266081
>steam demos article
https://litter.catbox.moe/4waqou.zip

could've sworn I already posted it, my b
Replies: >>266280
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>>266230
Anon most of the images are missing
Replies: >>266281
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>>266280
so?
Are you saying I'm lazy?
Because I am.
So maybe I forgot to remove the rest of the pages from my previous Steam Demos article.
So maybe I only rendered the first 4 pages of it for preview purposes
If you weren't a fake fan you'd have recognized those reviews from previous issues.
Big deal. 
So what?
You gonna call mr Miyagi and tell him I rack disiprine?
Oooooh I'm soooo scared.
Replies: >>266288
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you can also add this to the piling list of things I haven't finished
Replies: >>266288
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>>266281
Heh, I thought some of them looked familiar but didn't double check because I'm equally lazy.
Foreword please?

>>266282
This can be pushed to #10 since we have a good number of articles so far.
Forgot how frustrating getting used to the logic in scribus was. Should have arcade review posted soon™ but not now I'm sleepy goodnight.
Replies: >>266383
Is there a deadline?
Replies: >>266383
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>>266317
>how frustrating getting used to the logic in scribus was
Worry not, our Scribus™ Tech™ Support™ team is here to help. What seems to be the problem?

>>266356
Most of the material is done by now, so I'm hoping to release the issue by the end of this month.
Replies: >>266385
>>266383
Okay I got a page done for a review of one arcade but I went to two  so i figure ill get out the second one today and upload then post here
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>>266385
>I got a page done for a review of one arcade
Wanna post it so >we can rate?
Replies: >>266391
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>>266386
I ended up with a lot less space than I thought I would. reference to "RESET" is the arcade I went to first, and the other review I have to write. I don't know if anon's ocular senses will be too offended by the background.
Replies: >>266393
>>266391
The background could be improved in a few ways, but otherwise the article's design looks good. Well done!
My only suggestion for the next page is to add some breathing room around each header/subheader/paragraph...etc as the current page feels a little dense. Don't worry about it too much though.
Replies: >>266417
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i have complete. https://files.catbox.moe/0x4qvq.zip
>>266393
I know it's bad design but I kinda like how cramped that one feels. Also I added a grey background at 20% transparency for the whole page to hopefully help with reading.
Also I wanted to put this image in but it wont be not blurry and that was kinda frustrating. It renders clean and clear otherwise, but in scribus it renders as a fuckin blur of shit
Replies: >>266458 >>266459
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>>266417
I read both articles, good stuff. I needed to make a few corrections to the writing but nothing major. I do have some notes on the design though...
Number one; when I opened the articles in Scribus I found some text boxes were overflowing. This may not have been the case when you were editing them, but due to the quirky behavior of Scribus text may render differently on different machines, which is why adding space is necessary. No worries though, I'll adjust the text boxes after work and show you the result.
Number two; the backgrounds are clashing with the text. I have some ideas for that so I'll experiment a little and show you. The only thing I need now is the original unedited Truck Stop photos... Could you upload them please?

By the way that Ms Pacman image you posted is indeed blurry, but I found a better version online. I'll make sure to add it to the article.
Replies: >>266508 >>266509
>>266417
Between the blurry background and the cramped text with the thin font it's extremely difficult to read. With a couple filler images (give us some pictures of the games, anon) it could easily fill 2 pages.
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>>266146
Meant to reply to this earlier. I had no idea they did that, I just assumed the worst and looked no further. Thanks for letting me know, I'll try to check some out.
>>266458
pictchas 
>>266459
I didn't want to be greedy with page count since I was already making two reviews on two pages.
Replies: >>266512 >>266543
>>266458
>needed to make a few corrections to the writing but nothing major
>I'll adjust the text boxes 
>backgrounds are clashing with the text. I have some ideas for that so I'll experiment a little
I am willing to let the editor do his job. Hope I didn't fuck up too bad. Didn't use a spell check. And didn't know how to cram the images in with the text while keeping it to one page. 
>found a better version online
Thank you
Replies: >>266543
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>>266508
>I didn't want to be greedy with page count since I was already making two reviews on two pages.
Anon, it's a digital magazine, pages are free. Articles can be however many pages they need to read well. If it makes you feel better you could make a half-page ad and fit the article into 1.5 pages.
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>>266508
>>266509
How's this?
If you're happy with it I'll redo the Toledo article as well.
Replies: >>266547
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Gameboy homebrew article is done by the way.
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>>266543
That looks fine. The Ms Pacman background is too much for Toledo? Damn I thought that article looked much cleaner, or at least clean enough to be acceptable.
Replies: >>266552
>>266547
Both articles are clean, they just need more spacing and a subtler background.
>The Ms Pacman background is too much for Toledo?
It's a bit too detailed to fit as a background image, but I'll try to add it to the article itself next to the text.
Replies: >>266561
>>266552
>add it to the article itself next to the text
Nah don't worry about it. I would only suggest increasing the opacity of the grey boxes behind the text, but if she ain't huge as fuck front and center it's no biggie for her to not be in. 
I'll try to learn and improve for the next issue, I would like to make this a sort of hobby. Gives me another excuse to go to arcades more often and improve my writing and design skills, or at least go from 0 skill to anything higher.
>>266544
You see this looks clean as can be, very nice.
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>>266561
Toledo article is done, I gave it more or less the same treatment as Truck Stop... Let me know if you have any suggestions.
I uploaded the edited SLA files so you can take a look at them: https://litter.catbox.moe/sgw01a.zip
>I would like to make this a sort of hobby
That sounds like a lot of fun, go for it. I would love to do something similar but the number of arcades in my entire country can be counted on one hand... Maybe one day.
>this looks clean as can be, very nice
Thank you!
Replies: >>266618
>>266604
Looks fine to me. Sorry for giving you articles that you had to clean up so much.
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>>266618
Dude, your articles were extremely easy to edit, I barely did anything. Check the SLAs if you don't believe me.
You did good. Thank you for writing these articles.
>>266618
You should have seen the back-and-forth convos we had during the first couple of issues, you did good
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Another long-awaited MODS MODS MODS article.
Let me know if the background makes it difficult to read.

https://litter.catbox.moe/mkkpf7.zip
>>266864
v1.1: https://litter.catbox.moe/i0fucj.sla
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Hello Fags.
I am the same anon who did the Mario Strikers, Takeover, Gotham Faggots, Project Zero, Xeno Crisis, Slaps and Beans reviews and the Daikatana, Ouya 2, MoonMan Greatest Hits, Hitler Drink, Zelda and SS Subscription ADs.
Some of you may be thinking:
<You fucking nigger, where the fuck are the OneChanbara: Z2 Chaos and Dead Space reviews!? And what about the "GameScam" ad!?
I think I owe you an explanation.
Unfortunately, I have been working a lot lately, often doing double shifts, which left me very little time to work on my articles (or do anything else, really), then I got sick TWICE, and when they finally gave me some days off for Christmas, they also gave me some crappy security courses to do online that took hours to complete.
Let's just say that my new crappy job leaves me a lot less time to work on my stuff than before when I was unemployed.
I am really sorry and I apologize, but I assure you that the one who feels the most sorry is me.
These days, I'll try to at least finish the Onechanbara review, and maybe the GameScam ad as well.
Replies: >>266919
>>266864
give the text a partially-opaque black box background over the blindingly purple background.
Replies: >>266903 >>266938
>>266902
that is, under the text but over the background.
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>>266864
anoooooooooon
Looks good. Some suggestions:
- Justify all the text.
- Make some text bold or add subheaders between paragraphs, currently the article looks like a giant wall of text.
- Make background slightly darker.
- Make the shotgun rating text bold and squeeze the lines closer together.

>>266896
Hey anon
>I am the same anon who did [...]
Just say you're pasta anon and >we will get the hint.
>I have been working a lot lately, often doing double shifts
That's okay, don't beat yourself over it. I appreciate that you kept us updated.
Writing articles is something we do for fun, it shouldn't be another chore you're forced to do alongside your real job.
>the Onechanbara review, and maybe the GameScam ad
Sure, try finishing them if you have time. But for now, send me the source files for both without changes.
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>>266902
>partially-opaque
t r a n s l u c e n t 
:^)
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>>266919
- Justifying the text makes it look goofy and a literal wall of text
- I've already divided it into 3 columns instead of my standard 2, it already looks stupid when there's only one word per line in a paragraph. I'll see what I can do
- Added dark background to the text columns, tell me what you think
-Shotgun rating text is already bold, believe it or not

>missing fonts
skill issue
already used these before, you have to have them
I've also already linked you to the 10GB adobe font torrent at this point you have only yourself to blame
07cf49f3ea96-415fc561a-e47162979-c1e6137d19

v1.2:
https://litter.catbox.moe/sakmop.sla
>>266950
Its a lot more readable with the text boxes and the background still pokes through enough for it to be justified.
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you fags best be thankful we're anonymous, otherwise I'd just be writing articles about how great I am
http://rsdb.org/
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>>266950
Fine, here's my edit. I fixed the Shotgun Rating since it was a bit fucked... Let me know if I missed anything.

>>266970
Great list double abeed ackshualee "abeed" is plural, the singular form is "abd" so that would be "double abd"
Replies: >>267012
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>>266977
looks fine to me
>too scurred to download 10 gigabytes of dolphin porn from your trusty humble anon
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>muh hard drivvvvvvve
be a man and raid your local tech junkyard
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>>267013
>wangblows
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>>267013
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>windows
Replies: >>267155
>>267013
Based.
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>>267014
>>267015
Sorry didn't mean to scare you with all these perfectly functional audio drivers and hard drives filled with raw vidya.
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>>267155
How dare you loonix is a perfect system.
>>267155
What's this Winamp skin called?
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>>267155
You're not cool or special for using the same OS that most normalcattle use.
Replies: >>267227
>>266950
thanks for the fonts
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>>267185
Matrix is nothing
https://archive.org/details/winampskin_Matrix_is_nothing
>>267187
I never said I was cool.
I just said I would have less hassle with audio and video issues. 
If I had any.
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>>267227
Use REAL kino instead.
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>>267237
I prefer Winamp Modern (Classic)
Kinda miss the old WMP skins
https://skins.webamp.org/
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>>267239
So, did winamp ever got a full open source release?
Replies: >>267245 >>267321
>>267242
https://github.com/Ramazik/Winamp_Original_code
It's 5.x so useless for retrofagging. If you just want to use classic skins you're better off using Audacious instead.
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>>267242
There's WACUP, but it's not open sauce
https://getwacup.com/
Takes a couple of seconds, but you can plug a youtube playlist in there and play that.
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I'm almost done with the review of "Onechanbara Z2 Chaos," if all goes well, I should be able to finish it tomorrow.
As for the GameScam ad, my original idea was to do a few pages small catalog (like the ones they used to give away) with all the fake games, but maybe I'll keep the ad on one page, and do the rest in the next issue, i don't know.
Thanks again for your patience.
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The "Onechanbara Z2 Chaos" review is finally done.
I only need to do the last few adjustments and then i will publish it.
Then i will try to finish the "GameScam" ad as well.
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Finally, after numerous delays, re-edits, re-writes, pages added and then deleted, graphic changes and other crap...
HERE THE "ONECHANBARA Z2 CHAOS" REVIEW

https://litter.catbox.moe/riugj8.zip

Now, i am going back to work on the "GameScam Ad", hopefully it will take me only 30 minutes or so.
>>267497
Nice going anon! I'll check it out and give my comments when I get back from a business trip next week
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>>267497
>>267500
Fuck!
Here's an updated version, Scribus was still playing games with the character renders, cutting pieces of them.

https://litter.catbox.moe/rlqn6g.zip
>>267504
Holy shit, i really hate Scribus!
**I reloaded my files and it is yet again cutting Aya's fingers off, let me know if you have the same issue on your machine, if you have, then scratch the updated version i posted and just use the first one, since it should be mostly fine.
Replies: >>267520 >>267530
>>267504
>>267511
I can't see anything at the moment but are you changing the shape of the image itself? If yes, don't. When you add an image, keep it as a rectangle / square.
To wrap text, add a square and change its shape, then make it transparent. Or just use the template, dummy.
>>267511
Screenshots from this link >>267504
It looks like the fingers are fine. I have that 10gb font thing anon posted but it seems that it doesn't cover the fonts you're using. I have no fucking clue what I'm doing with these fonts and it isn't working. 
But, the fingers look fine.
>>267530
I deleted the screenshots realizing maybe I shouldn't be posting other anon's work like that. Assume I'm not lying about the fingers, because I'm not.
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>>267530
>>267531
If it looks okay on your machine then great.
Maybe there is something on my part that corrupts the files when i save them a certain number of times.
Last time i saved it >>267504 everything was fine, i even made a pdf to see how it was going to look like, and everything was fine.
Then, i later re-opened the file and, once again, Scribus was moving around the character renders and cutting them as it pleased.
But again, if the issue doesn't appear on your device, then great.
The most important thing is that it looks fine on the magazine.
Replies: >>267538
>>267530
>>267533
About the fonts, the article only uses 'Arial', 'Impact' and 'Times New Roman' (regular, bold and italic).
So nothing fancy there.
Replies: >>267555
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>>267538
No comic sans? Papyrus? Parchment?
Do it over.
What happened to that awesome sci-fi xbox cover some anon did a few threads ago?
It would be a shame not to use it.
I remember he also did some other cool ones that were never used.
Replies: >>267651
>>267629
I'm not a fan of the xbox-tan cover, her proportions are weird.
>he also did some other cool ones
Such as?
Replies: >>267740
I am the same anon who did...
...all that shit.
Anyway, since i heard this issue is lacking ADs i am working on a Netflix parody that i will first post to get some feedback.
As for the GameScam one, i wasn't satisfied by how the second page looked as it ended up being too cluttered, maybe because i tried putting too many fake games in it.
I am still unsure if i should keep it at one page or maybe put less games on the second page, we'll see.
to the editorfag:
Did you solve the font issue in the 'Onechanbara Z2 Chaos' review?
Replies: >>268116
>>267651
>Such as?
The Z-tan one we used on Issue 5 and another one.
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Netflix parody Ad
feedback welcome.
Replies: >>267994 >>267997
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>>267993
nice

>the plural of "anime" is still "anime"
>the "The" on "The Witcher" logo is barely visible in front of that medallion thingy, just make the logo so big it matches the nig width
>I would reword the text in a following manner, but it's just me:

TRASHFLIX prime video+ (tm):
The ONLY place for you to watch our faithful adaptations of everyone's favorite anime and video games!

We're not simply asking you to watch shitty propaganda,
we're telling to pay for it
Go fuck yourself (tm)
>>267994
Got it.
Still a WIP though, as for  the "We are not simply..." i was also thinking about:
"Trashflix prime video+"
"Imagine even paying for this shit"
Replies: >>267997
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>>267994
How about now?
Ignore the witcher logo, i will change that
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>>267993
It's nicely put and the images in particular look good, including their details like Gerald's hair and his medallion.
>>267994
>>the "The" on "The Witcher" logo is barely visible in front of that medallion thingy, just make the logo so big it matches the nig width
If after resizing the "The" still obstructs the medallion, you could try removing it and use that as a somewhat subtle reference to the next game not having Gerald as the MC.
>>267995
Another idea for the bottom text: "It's not propaganda if you have to pay for it."
>>267996
The footnote idea is good.
If you want to play with its text, how about something like "As concluded from a survey of poly-amorous women between the ages of 28 to 60 without prior video-game experience" or any other groups you can think of.
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>>267997
Thank you for the feedback, I appreciate and take note
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>>267996
I like it
While the font matches the NETFLIX logo, I keep wanting to see a thinner font aligned to the top left and then bottom right.
I don't know why, so experiment with different fonts to see if you stumble into an unexpected layout you may like.
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GameScam Ad WIP
I will probably change the prices and add some more stupid crap, as usual feedback is welcome.
Replies: >>268021
>>267996
Instead of prime video, you should change it to primate video and the smile-logo below it should be a nigger red smile something something
Replies: >>268020
>>268018
Not sure if i'll manage to do the nigger smile, but i'll keep in mind the "primate video" suggestion.
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>>268017
Sorry, here's the second page
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ran into some potential material
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>>268090
>Quest 64
lol I finally beat that turd recently.  Definitely not a game I would choose to represent the console.
Replies: >>268094
>>268093
How many RPGs were there on the system? It's like one of 3 or something
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>>268090
>>268091
>>268092
Cool.
I wish the artist did the Mega Drive/ Genesis too.
Replies: >>268127
>>268094
Ogre Battle 64
Paper Mario
Quest 64
Aidyn Chronicles
Shiren the Wanderer 2
Hybrid Heaven
Harvest Moon 64

Did I miss any?
>>267690
I finally looked at the article, seems fine at a glance but the font "Arial Black" is not working for some reason... Could you upload that?

>>268021
>>267996
Both of these are amazing, looking forward to those SLAs.

>>268089
The Balatro ad is perfect, I'm using that.
Replies: >>268127 >>268158
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>>268095
yeah, his artstation page has alternative background versions if anyone's interested:
https://www.artstation.com/pierreroussel/albums/8482338

>>268116
Found a slightly less crusty version. Like a dozen pixels left uncrushed.
Replies: >>268141
>>268127
You should put a jewish kid instead.
>>268116
>seems fine at a glance but the font "Arial Black" is not working for some reason... Could you upload that?
Here's the Arial fonts i used.

https://litter.catbox.moe/rgca4d.zip

The other ones were 'Times New Roman' for the review itself, 'Play" for the screenshots' captions, and 'Impact' only for the "review" in the title, i think.
>>268158
The GameScam and Trashflix Ads are basically done.
If everything goes smoothly, will upload the SLAs tomorrow.
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another piece that could be used in an ad by someone more creative than I.
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>>268255
Is there a taller version of this image? It could be used as a mock environmentalist ad with the title "go green" or something
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>>268483
Maybe you can generate it with the Artificial Jew.
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GameScam Ad
And
TRASHFLIX Ad
Are finally done!

https://litter.catbox.moe/firdkx.zip
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>>268486
>AI
Hard pass not like I could make it work anyway
I could try recreating the whole thing if I have time.

>>268495
Very good, thank you. But I have one thing to say: you must use the Scribus template next time. The GameScam ad had the left/right page orientations fucked up, which took some time to fix. So before you start working on another ad or article, download the Scribus template in the OP and build on that. Please and thank you.

>>268158
The fonts worked, but I haven't had time to proofread the whole thing and correct the misplaced elements yet. I'll get around to it soon-ish.
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>>268502
>The GameScam ad had the left/right page orientations fucked up, which took some time to fix.
Sorry to hear that man, could it be because I did it on individual pages instead of side-by-side? Or is it the usual fuckery of when a job done on Windows is then opened on Linux?
>So before you start working on another ad or article, download the Scribus template in the OP and build on that. Please and thank you.
I will.
I am sorry for the headache it gave you.
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>>268520
Don't apologize to him.
He chose the linux lifestyle.
It is his cross to bear, regardless of his carpet bombing religion.
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>>268608
It's not a question of lifestyle or religion, it's just a question of not wanting your computing to be controlled and spied by Jew Gates.
Replies: >>268632 >>268692
>>268620
The point was that it isn't anon's fault if Scribus isn't stable and fucks things up if you import your work from Windows to Linux.
**and vice versa*
Replies: >>268692
>>268608
>Don't apologize to him.
>He chose the linux lifestyle.
I mean, i am sorry he had trouble with it, but it is not my fault if Linux fucks things up.
When i did it on windows, everything was displayed correctly.
But maybe it is Scribus' fault because apparently the issues i had in Windows, like when Scribus cut Aya's render's fingers, was instead displayed correctly when the editorfag opened it in Linux, so maybe it is Scribus itself the issue.
Replies: >>268692
>>268620
>>268632
>>268680
>biting the bait this hard
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>>266053 (OP) 
man what the hell
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>>268836
Sounds like a (You) problem...
https://www.virustotal.com/gui/url/4fbd0358a3f98c72e829498143668737f597e71da92ad0de188cab99f90990fd
https://www.virustotal.com/gui/url/83b429c53f9ab186a369d38e0f71890c54b0fba3d4cf1d689116c7088853291a
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>>268158
Finally finished editing Onechanbara, please look at those two images carefully and let me know if there are any further changes you want.
>>268158
>>268844
Forgot to ask, what do you mean by:
>The combos and special attacks are pretty cool and well animated, and have nothing to envy to those found in more established titles such as Bayonetta or Devil May Cry.
Replies: >>268892
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>>268844
>Finally finished editing Onechanbara, please look at those two images carefully and let me know if there are any further changes you want.
Fantastic.
Not that important, but in second column of the second page, i would put "think of it like a reload mechanic, but for swords instead of guns" between parenthesis, and the "L1" just before that in bold.
But it is not that important, it could stay the way it is.
Happy to see the character renders are displayed correctly, that was the only real worry i had.
>>268845
>Forgot to ask, what do you mean by...
I just meant that the combos and special attacks are cool and the animations are good, nothing too technical.
I mean, this is obviously a low-budget game, and you can tell that the first time you play it, but things like the combos you can pull off and the animations are not inferior to those found in higher-budget games of the same genre such as Bayonetta.

Anyway...
I still have that 'Parasite in City' review on hold that it was almost done, so what do i do? Should i finish it?
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>>268844
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>>268844
Not a comment on your work per se but...
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>>268894
Too old?
You mean the game reviewed is too old?
I mean, we had older games featured in the magazzzine, who cares.
This is not IGN where we have to review the latest turds.
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>>268897
I'm not sure if you're joking, but if you aren't, I mean the characters.
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The issue is pretty much complete, all that's left is the foreword. Anybody wanna write that?

>>268892
Noted, thank you.
>spoiler
That will be pushed to issue #10 but finish it anyway if you have time.

>>268893
What am I looking at here?
>>268958
He's probably making a "you lost the game". 
>game
>the game 
>you just lost
But idk. Or maybe "the game in store when u combine some anon." or some such in a schizophrenics mind.....
>>268958
>What am I looking at here?
the little finger is cut off
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Been fucking around with an XP laptop and while looking up contemporary software I ran into these press kit CDs:
https://archive.org/details/gamepresskits
filled to the brim with grainy screenshots we know and love from the old mags
The one I tested out for Gamecube + GameBoy Advance is basically an HTML file that links to raw images on the CD, very handy and quick. Also includes those basic background assets which we often overlook. This could be very useful.

>>268963
She'll live, don't worry about it.

>>268892
>You CHOOSED the ladder
damn dude, at least cover up her twat and titties
I'll have a looksee after I burn this fucking keyboard

>>268958
>foreword
Oh I'll knock one out right now you stupid bitch.
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>>268964
>damn dude, at least cover up her twat and titties
I am pretty sure her twat is already censored with the usual Japanese mosaic.
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>>268964
Quick and dirty.
Will post better version later.

>>268965
I'm pretty sure I can see it all.
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>>268964
>gamepresskits
IA truly is the gift that keeps on giving. Thank you for this.

>>268969
>Quick and dirty.
Replies: >>268972
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>>268971
You'll see

https://litter.catbox.moe/3o8kng.zip
Replies: >>268979
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>>268972
No missing fonts this time? I'm disappointed. Thanks anon
I had to make some adjustments so the text is more readable, let me know if you have any comments before I call it a wrap.
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>>268979
Updated version
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>>268982
Minor nitpick: you should put an ad between the foreword and the TOC so they're both on the right-facing page, like they would be in a print magazine.
Replies: >>268992
>>268982
Byotiful
What's that background, is it the moon or some kind of dirty fabric?
Replies: >>268992
>>268985
That's not a good idea...

>>268986
It's actually a water surface but the colors are inverted then set to grayscale.
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>>268982
Noice!
>>268982
On the left column "expect my sex dungeon" should be "except my sex dungeon".
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this is taking years off my life
I wish I went to art school instead of wasting my time with a trade degree smh fr fr fam
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>>268964
found another resource, apparently one of their guys had to develop his own OCR software in order to make selectable text in wonky game magazines, so it's easier to search through mag scans:

https://archive.gamehistory.org/explore
Replies: >>269059
>>269055
I've been looking forward to MicroReviews! A small suggestion: change the font to Orbitron so it's more fitting with the theme. Consider a dark background too.

>>269058
I forgot that the VGHF archive launched, this would be a great resource for the zzzine.
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>>269059
not a 100% sure about Orbitron
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>>269060
you guys are so lucky I don't have a gun license, otherwise I would have shot myself a long time ago.

God it reads like shit.
Still can't get it right.
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>>269063
Try using columns for the text, indenting some paragraphs may help too.
And for the text box at the bottom, it doesn't have to shaped like stairs. Straight lines should work fine and are far easier to use (and are likely better for Scribus too since you only use two nodes instead of many more).
Replies: >>269068
>>269063
Well, i am just glad you changed the background, that green one was awful to look at.
>>269065
the co-editor said diagonal lines fuck up during his .sla->.pdf->.loonix conversion
Replies: >>269077
>>269063
The lower review doesn't look good, I thought you were gonna duplicate the upper review for the other games... Why don't you try that first?
And add (1) diagonal angle to a text box corner of your choosing.

>>269068
What are you talking about?
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>>269077
whenever we did diagonal shapes it would fuck up the edges of text and images
Pastanigger has constant issues with it in his articles
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>>269085
I can't wait for someone to tell me there's an easier way to do this.
Because I feel like I'm Pink the Floyd trying out different microdoses of acid to see what sticks.
>>269087
There's an easier way to do this.

here, i said it.
>>269087
The blue background you picked here >>269063 was better.
>>269085
The short version: Scribus shits the bed when you change the shape of an image and reopen the file, so don't change the shape of images. You can still change the shape of other items such as squares/triangles and text boxes.

Long version: you can change the shape of images and not have Scribus shit the bed, if and only if the new shape of the image is smaller than its original shape. For example, if your image was originally a square and you cut it into a hexagon that's inside the original square, then that's fine. If you otherwise shape the image into a rectangle larger than the original square, then you've fucked up. I hope that makes sense...
With that being said, in most cases you don't want to reshape images anyway, unless you're literally cutting a corner like you're doing with MicroReviews. Anything else, such as text wrapping, is better done with a shaped square/triangle that exists on a text wrapping layer that is not printed.

>>269087
I can't tell what "way" you're talking about until I look at the actual SLA file.
Replies: >>269150
>>269149
Is there a way to contact the Scribus devs and ask them to fix that shit?
Replies: >>269152
>>269150
Yeah I used their bug tracker once before, my problem got resolved eventually but it took a while.
https://bugs.scribus.net/view_all_bug_page.php
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oh no, ALREADY?!
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>>269063
>>269087
You know what (i think) your main issue is?
That your "MicroReviews" aren't so "micro",  after all.
I think that you should just give each review a full page instead of trying to fit all that shit in only half of it to pretend those reviews are "micro".
Another issue is that by trying to cram both of them in one single page, you are making two walls of text that aren't pleasing to read.
With all that stuff you wrote for each of them, you should just drop all pretenses of tiny reviews and just do two regular reviews, even if they are only one page each.
I known you spent lots of time to make the logo, but at this point you should just drop it, or, place it in the middle of two pages.
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you fuckers are gonna get something in pidgin one of these days
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>>269198
Christ
Since everything seems to be ready, I'll release the issue this weekend, probably Friday. Any last requests or edits should be reported now.
This will be the cover: https://litter.catbox.moe/g31889.png
Replies: >>269276 >>269301
>>269275
can you upload our buttbaby of an .sla for the Foreword/Table of Contents?
>uploading to catbox instead of just attaching an image here
did you forget we have spoilers or something?
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>>269276
>uploading to catbox instead of just attaching an image here
You're right, here's your Foreword anon :^)
https://litter.catbox.moe/cu6qv1.zip
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>>269278
I'm not going to try digging up your zip-bomb defusal kit.
Also, shit's borked or somethin

look all I wanted to do was correct the mistake pointed out here: >>269028 , change "Astral-project deez nuts in your face" to make it dated, "Every time I show up TO a match, the chat fills UP with "F"s." and they make "Monster energy drink out of my SWEAT" now, don't want to have two references to piss or people might start talking piss. I mean shit.

I also wanted to see if I could change the shape of that background shade you added to fit his cape, otherwise it looks kinda blocky and unfinished, especially on a 2-page spread.
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>>269282
>Also, shit's borked or somethin
Can you try Scribus 1.6.3?
https://sourceforge.net/projects/scribus/files/scribus/1.6.3/
>correct the mistake
>change to make it dated
Done and done.
>change the shape of that background
How's this?
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>>269286
>1.6.3 is out
oopsie poopsie
>How's this 
good, maybe increase the size of it by like 5%-10% and it'll be almost as perfect as me
>>269275
>This will be the cover: 
I like the bottom part with the fake bar code and the two screenshots, but i still believe it would look better with some game's logos than just having the titles written in plain text.
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>>269301
Like, it would be cool to have at least the Onechanbara z2 chaos logo posted here >>267497
>>269198
Keep this idea in your back pocket for the GTA 6 review.
Replies: >>269311
>>269310
>Keep this idea in your back pocket for the GTA 6 review.
Or the Ass Creed Shadows review :^)
>>269286
fuck i wish i realized the vamp gimmick i woulda put that in my arcade review for reset.

>arcade in a bar you gotta be fucked up to think this place ain't shit

>walk up to shoot the hoops and the balls popped when i dropped a quarter in

>fed ms pacman so many dots the sucked the blue outta the whole joints nuts

>glanced at the mando pinball got babby yeed talkin plain english to me and i dont fuckin listen

>quarter machine try to jew me so the staff give me back enough to pay for my wasted time then apologize

>crew see me case the joint and leave me the fuck alone knowin their bills bout to be gettin paid in hot ash

>these games fear me cuz, the only one wants to try gotta have a squad of 36 to even turn on

>moron kombat felt me  turn the machine on and gave up. cpu held its own block button like it was stuck and still got finished like a skank in the bathroom

>ufo machine caught my glance and phoned home. i told it dont sweat it et i already got all your prizes and sold em to your operator

Maybe I'll pay better attention next time. Maybe I can squeeze that in on Friday but that's too late right. That should have been the entire review fuck that place
Replies: >>269350
Catbox isnt loading shit for me. Is this just a me issue?
Replies: >>269342 >>269348
>>269341
What about litterbox?
Replies: >>269347 >>269348
>>269342
Same shit.
Replies: >>269348
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>>269341
>>269342
>>269347
https://ayaya.beauty/
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>>269330
don't sweat it dude, I came up with the dracula flow intro on the spot, there was no pre-text
Replies: >>269377
>>269350
i font sweat, blood. dont know what it means. last time i considered a sweat the spanish rushed over looking for the fountain of youth and rekt their ship straight into my fat cock of gibraltar
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>>269348
>JAN 2022
ok litterbox werks now, luckily what i wanted expired anyway.
I know it's probably too soon to talk about it, but, are we going to do anything special for issue number 10?
Replies: >>269434 >>269451
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>>269431
yes and no
you'll see
but probably yes
but before that no
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>>269434
rAW TiMe!!
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>>269431
im doing my part
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Anons, I finally give you...
SLEEPY STATION #9

Thanks to everyone who submitted articles, ads, and art. This issue may be long overdue but I believe it's the most polished SS issue yet. See you in the next one!
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>>269491
>>269491
what happened to the onechanbara cover?
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>>269491
> I believe it's the most polished SS issue yet.
I don't know.
I felt it had too much filler and not enough substance (articles).
Replies: >>269510
>>269491
Very nice
>>269501
So it is just like the real thing.
>>269491
I am the same anon who did...
whatever.
I am kinda bummed by the edit in the Trashflix Ad, i have got to admit.
When i wrote "Imagine even paying for this kind of shit" it was supposed to be a jab at the real Netflix, the shit they do, and those who pay for it, while "imagine paying for this shit" instead feels like it is directed strictly to the parodied version.
Replies: >>269540
>>269538
I can change it back no worries.

>>269496
The artfag changed his mind and didn't want that cover to be used.
Replies: >>269543
>>269540
>I can change it back no worries.
Thanks anon.
A little mistake i did in the Onechanbara review, in the second column of the second page, i wrote that the "ecstasy combination" special attack can be performed by pressing triangle and square, while actually it was triangle and circle.
My bad
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I just finished an artice for issue 10, having gone back and fixed the text and images in actual article a lot of times. Just now finished a "cover" leading page for the article itself. Maybe best for it to be used earlier in the issue as a kind of advert for the article. I'm about to start working on another article and with it return to a more standardized format but really wanted to get this one out because I covered every arcade 3 in a downtown area of a little city and got pretty excited making the article. So this one is more of a "special", if you will.
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>>269627
Arcade reviews are pretty cool. How much money did you drop on the games?
Replies: >>269629
>>269628
Barely any for that article. Pizza Planet was an arcade like the one Charles Entertainment Cheese runs, so I didn't play any of those games. You have to load money onto a plastic card to even play a single game, and all the games are new like very new and not what a grown man would want to play if he's looking for an arcade. So I ate the pizza that was actually good and counted the games and left. Funny enough I didn't use the count in the article. The second place I went to has an owner that refuses to charge money for games, She even rejected a guy who wanted to put a UFO machine in her establishment because he wanted a percentage and she REFUSES to charge money. Third, and final, place I went to only had 3 games so  I spent just enough to make sure they worked then left.
Typically, though, I have a $5 rule, where I dedicate myself to spending the full $5 and judging based on that, with bonus point being for id I want to stay and spend even more.
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>>269629
>refuses to charge money
Anon, those are Arcade1ups. She couldn't charge money if she wanted to, they're the milennial version of plug-n-play joysticks. You can get them for like $200 on craigslist. They are dogshit and everyone I've heard of who's bought one has either regretted it or traded up to a real cab.
Replies: >>269689 >>269699
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>>269683
>couldn't charge money if she wanted to
False.
>plug-n-play joysticks
True.
My favorite part was that she spent all that money and rejected getting money directly from the machines, which you factually can convert into quarter eaters. Going as far as rejecting a machine partnership because it would entail having a machine be not free is wonderful. When I went in it was not expected for me to spend a single cent on anything at all. I only got delicious ice cream after I was completely finished playing. Boy, I sure do love non-kike behavior and I will praise it when I see it :)
Perhaps an excerpt from my article on the matter will be of service to you, pic related. I need to change the color of those exclamation points to gold
>>269683
>Arcade1ups
I first thought those were cool until i managed to see one with my own eyes.
They arr cheap as fuck and the price isn't justified for that shit.
Replies: >>269710
>>269699
Yeah they look awesome until you realize the cabinet is built like a $90 ikea bookshelf, the control panel is built like a $50 aliexpress fightstick, the screen is from a first generation ipad and the ARM shitbox inside has (or had) some serious input lag problems. The only one worth a damn is the Star Wars one and that's just because the original flight yoke is unobtainium.
Replies: >>269744
>>269627
Much better than the the previous article, let me give you some comments...

<front page
- The circle in the top left corner needs something in the middle, currently it feels empty having only the text around the border.
- The giant floating head is clashing with the text because they both have the same colors. I would change the head from white and brown to dark-ish blue and black respectively.
- The background should be darkened as well, the closer to pure black it is the better.

<minot
- Change the font to a serif one (i.e. Times New Roman & friends).
- The text and images need more room around them. Remove or shrink the biohazard symbols at the bottom and give the text some space.
- Either put both the genie and Tucker in the center of the page, or move them to opposite corners of the page so there's symmetry.

<pizza planet
- For the white/red text, make the white lines a more basic font (e.g. Orbitron).
- Remove the first "pizza fucking planet!!!!!!" line at the top.
- The highlighted text looks bad. Try removing the highlights, making the text a bright color, and darkening the "glass" rectangle behind it.
- Change the font of the "hey kids" box, maybe try something newsprint-like?
- The layout in general should be reworked. The picture in the bottom center especially looks out of place. I'm not exactly sure how to improve this layout, but I can try throwing shit at the wall if I have the SLA. For now don't worry about this too much.
Replies: >>269730 >>269803
>>269721
><front page
>circle at the top
Ya I was thinking I might should put something in that. I think I'll be reusing that circle so I kept it empty in the center considering the future. I'll see if I can find a good thing for the middle. 
>giant mage head + text + background
I want that page to look and be pretty disorienting. The idea being that the mage is casting a spell out of his bead of television static. This is the reason I made the text the same colors as the mage. Perhaps the bottom text that's doing the actual advertising for the article can be different colors, I'll try to make that work. I can darken the background a little bit, but still I really want the whole thing to be a disorienting ocular assault. That is the goal.
><minot
>font
Okay I can do that. It seems about half of what I've been doing the past two days is looking for fonts.
>images
Alright I can move that shit around and try to make it more appeasing to the eye
><pizza planet
>wthite/red text
Alright I'll look at that but that little section is my favorite part of the whole article. I think you may need to tell the advertisers to shove it on that one boss
>Remove the first "pizza fucking planet!!!!!!" line at the top.
Absolutely not.
>highlighted text
I agree, I'll fuck around with that and make it less shit. Your suggestion sounds good.
>picture at the bottom
I'll fuck around with the pictures, maybe I can make it look nicer by darkening them either outright or making them less opaque.
>for now don't worry too much
You got it.
>>269710
> the ARM shitbox inside has (or had) some serious input lag problems
How is this level of crap programming even possible? The original Galaga arcade had a Z80 CPU or something.
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>>269721
I ficked around a little with the front page, I think I'd might like to mess around with the spiral fade so it's more consistent with the spiral text, but it should currently be servicable at least as a proof of concept.
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>>269803
Small edit, I only realized after posting it here that the left stage right side of the mage's hat was cut off. Fixed that and recentered him
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I just wasted a fair amount of time on a cute idea that turned out worthless for my intention. Maybe someon else will like it.
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>>269814
What were you planning to do with those?
I have no idea what those 'page turn template' could be used for.
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>>269855
Just a cute little thing in the bottom corner for "what's ahead". I was looking for something similar to pics related and saw the icon that i posted and had the idea and the idea didn't work out so great. Maybe I can salvage the idea I dunno
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I have finished a rough draft for an article on Super Marion Arcade. Probably typos abound, but the layout and bulk of the body is pretty much done. I have about a third of the second page empty, but I could fill it with more words and or pictures. I also figure it could be used as real estate for anyone that might like to insert an ad, like how you would sometimes see in old zines. I can fill the space, but wanted to extend the opportunity to anyone that might be interested. The available room is 87.5x257 mm. I want to emphasize that I am extending this not as an attempt to get others to do the filling out for me, only as an attempt to collaborate with anon if he may have any ideas in the coming months.

On another note, I don't plan on trying to fill out the issue with a shit ton of arcade articles. I had the material and wanted to get it put down. Doing this typing and layout stuff is fun. Makes time fly by.
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I wonder if the anon who did the Resident Evil 5 review is still with us.
I recently read it and had a good laugh.
Good shit.
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>>269875
I'm glad you liked it.
I hope you've enjoyed my other works (they're the ones with too many words), I try to do 1-2 articles/ads per issue.
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>>269883
I certainly look forward to read more of them, hope you'll stick around.

Since we are almost at issue number 10 let me ask you guys which articles/reviews you liked the most so far?
Favorite Ads?
Which issue you guys enjoyed the most?
Which one you think is the best one/came out better so far?
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Fixed up grammar, as well as trying to not end lines with a one-letter single-word beginning of a sentence, or beginning a line with a short single-word end of  a sentence, as I will demonstrate the shittiness of with the following sentence. I
also added a gradient fade to tansparency to a couple images, as well as adding a cheeky image in the space for maybe or maybe not an
ad. I'm sure there's still things I will need or want to fix up in the future. Will likely get back to fixing up the Minot article this weekend so it is more acceptable, taking into consideration suggestions and critiques made ITT.
>>269875
I liked the one for legacy of kain, it convinced me to play it and the sequel
Replies: >>269931 >>270195
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>>269930
Please tell me it was because of the 2 paragraph rant about gypsies
Also, anons, because my work- nay, mine ART has convinced someone to play a video game, I am now officially an influencer which I am happy is still considered a typo by my autocorrect
From now on I will only review games if I get a free copy with cheats and a sloppy from the devs.
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>>269931
I liked the descriptions of the powers like the amazon express blood or whatever it was
Replies: >>269933
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>>269932
oh yeah, i was pretty proud of that one.
thanks
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>>269933
you should write one for soul reaver too beucase I'd like to see your take on it, personally despite playing like a modern title for some reason I found the overall experience somewhat lacking when compared to blood omen
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>>269934
I started playing it on a Dreamcast emulator a year or so ago, but it's very fiddly and the Raspberry pi I'm running it on has a noticeable input delay, so I've been reluctant to come back to it.
According to a longplay I'm about a quarter of a way through since I'm in the Silenced Cathedral and skipped a couple of areas on my way there. Since it's been so long I'd have to re-learn the controls and mechanics. So I'm considering playing the remaster instead.
The game's been on my backlog for decades and I can never get around to playing it fully.
I also have this problem where I start playing too many games and don't finish any of them, still have the rest of demos to go through.
Replies: >>269937 >>270199
>>269936
I didn't have a problem with the controls, I found them surprisingly smooth and intuitive even when compared to more modern titles, I can't quite put my finger on what was it that made me not enjoy the whole package as much as the prequel even when it was on paper it was a direct upgrade on many fronts. I dunno about the remasters, from the screenshots they look ok visually I guess, although I'm not a big fan of the redesigns of some stuff
>>269930
>I liked the one for legacy of kain
Was that one made by the same anon who did RE5?
>>269936
Dungeon Siege is pure shit you can skip it
Replies: >>270241
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>>270199
sorry can't hear you over all this fun I'm having
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no clue where it's from or if it's real
>>270719
>genital piercings
GENITALIA
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>>270719
>She makes us cry and we don't know why.
It can't be real.
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>>270719
>pic related
>>270719
Cream the rabbit.
A name or a command?
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>>270719
>She makes us want to cry and we don't know why.
>>270719
ToT
I liked the design of the article about homebrew game boy games.
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>>270733
Both.
idk what turbosperg retard you set off by making this stupid magazine but he's been shitting up sportschan nonstop ever since you posted the thread about this there and in case the retard is lurking here fuming i just wanted to let you know sportschan isn't oart of your faggot webring and there is no need to go on a tirade there because spartmen don't give a shit about your dumbass drama you are doing the internet equivalent of an autistic child screaming at a total stranger because a kid at his school wore a shirt he didn't like
you will probably always be a broken brained mental retard and will probably continue to shit the site up out of autistic spite, but i figured i'd just let you know everyone around you both on and offline are better than you including the normalfags
>>270899
>autistic rambling
This is what too many crik paddles to your dome does to you.
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>>270900
i know you think youre some kinda mastermind but youre not fooling anyone with your spazzing budy
carry on tho destructive behavior is all you have and theres no fixing it
>>270899
Maybe don't spam your faggot niggerbowl viewing "invitations" across the webring then.
>>270899
It's some third party faggot trying to start shit because imageboards refuse to die and he thinks that's like another holocaust. Congrats, you gave him what he wanted.
Replies: >>271004
idk spartman is chill this feels like forced drama
>>270958
It is.
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>>270958
>>270969
i agree
>>270906
>It's some third party faggot trying to start shit because imageboards refuse to die and he thinks that's like another holocaust.
So, niggerpill?
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>>270958
it is
quite from my in/sp/ider
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I came up with such a horrendous idea for a faux-article that I actually got upset at myself.
I'll type it out in a couple of hours.
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>>271399
Why Twitch viewers are the best parents

People who watch Twitch streamers are numerous. Just looking at the front page you can see thousands, if not millions of people enjoying the surly baritones of their favorite streamer or empowering life advice from a sex-positive worker. Be it jacuzzi talks, sleep cams or even video games (if you're into that sort of thing, we don't judge here), your every desire can be fulfilled by a stranger across the internet.
And who is stranger than your own child? We here at Sleepy Station are intimately familiar with child-rearing and how similar it is to being a loyal stream fan. Whenever our favorite streamer wants a donation, we give them one, because ultimately they deserve it. The amount of happiness they've brought to us over the years more than makes up for taking out a second mortgage. The joy we felt when our beloved stream mommy said our name for the first time is immeasurable. Oh, to be able to relive the joy we felt when we first saw our streamer play a game we suggested. Teaching them the ins and outs of a particularly difficult boss and seeing them finally overcome one is the most rewarding experience a chat member can have, unrivaled even by your toddler's first steps.
A recent study by Vox magazine has shown that even polycules have been far more successful and prouder parents than traditional nuclear family units, given that they spend at least 3 hours a day following their Twitch tales. It stands to show how much we have progressed as a society where we subconsciously impart wisdom upon others without any immediate reward. We are so proud of this community.

This is purely a product of my deranged mind and a window into my messed up psyche.
Nobody better dare to tell me this was a real article written within the last decade by a "reputable" publication. I don't think I can stomach that, not after the week I've had.
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>>271407
>We here at Sleepy Station are intimately familiar with child-rearing
The "stream mommy" bit was too on the nose but everything else
<we are so proud of this community
was positively awful in the right sense. I can see this on a "parody" 'zine so I'd go for it and print the page.
>dare to tell me this was a real article written within the last decade by a "reputable" publication
I wouldn't be able to tell you either. Good work I guess.
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>>271407
is the stream mommy real? I want to know the stream mommy!
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>>271409
I didn't come up with as much material as I thought I would for this bit, so it would have to share page space with an ad or two.
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>>269913
I like the 9th issue the most thus far. Though the Beedition will always have a spot in my heart. And #5 is also very well put together. It's hard to pick.
The Xbox softmodding article was by fart the most useful because I actually hacked my Xbox following its directions, thanks for that.
The Sleepy Station Subscription form was probably my favorite because it fit in with the rest of the mag so well.
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>>271875
I liked issue 2 and 5 the most, and i liked number 4 as well.

I liked the Overblood review, it was well done, and i appreciated it was written like a friend sharing his opinion of a game he liked with you, instead of going for a "professional" style.
The Resident Evil 5 review made me genuinely laugh.
The Metroid Dread article was very good and gives all the criticism that mediocre crap deserves.
How hard is it to make a game review for the mag? Do I have to be good at games? I suck.
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>>273691
1. Pretty easy.
2. Nope.

Just write your thoughts on notepad or something and post them here, then anons can give you feedback.
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More Steam-fest demo reviews, read 'em and weep. If anybody has anything to add on the games mentioned here, feel free to do so:



Duil
JL Apps
-Bad Dead Cells clone, clearly an early demo, even the settings menu is unavailable. Nowhere near as fluid, looks pretty barren, lots of negative space. Works off a wonky stamina/energy system where you can have 5 weapons or spells. Combat is as stiff as the movement, you can only attack one enemy at a time, even if they're standing right next to each other. Levels are gigantic and sections are copied and pasted. Dying sends you to a pointless platforming section where you have to find an exit portal, very tedious.

Nothing Beyond this point
Dieuwt
-Cryptic rogue-like, very pixel graphics, got soul to it, probably made by a single person, crusty sound design. Interesting ammo/health system similar to that of Ooze on Sega Genesis: the more ammo you spend, the less health you have. Navigation is intentionally cryptic, think Legend of Zelda East-West-South-West puzzle. Backtracking can be a chore until you find the map. Reminds me of Midnight Station. Not bad at all, would have been a colossal indie gem back in the early 2000's. If the dev tightens some of the combat aspects, I'd have an easier time giving a glowing recommendation.

ROBOBEAT (already out)
Simon Fredholm
-BRM clone, wears it on its sleeve, very stylized, pretty much as difficult to look at as BPM, very curious about my personal data for some reason. Weapons have their own quirks and beat variations. There's dodging, charging, parrying, etc. You can import your own music, cut it up to suit the regular and battle themes of a level. You can also switch between tracks on the fly. Some of the animations are lacking. 

Wartorn
Stray Kite Studios
-Very clunky tactics MOBA/RTS wannabe, controls like ass, I can see where they were going with this, but it's just not good or way too raw for now. Voice acting is terrible, along with recording equipment mismatch not doing it any favors. Everything is smudged in Vaseline, very hazy and unclear, it's supposed to look like and oil painting, but the effect only obstructs your view. Barely reached 40fps and still maxxed out my 1080 Ti. Have to hold Shift and drag in order to select multiple units. Think "Company of Heroes", but dogshit.

Dragonkin the Banished
Eko Software
French ARPG that wants to be "Lost Ark" badly, almost fried my GPU, looks and controls fine, but the attack animations are slow, and you get swarmed by trash mobs all the time. Everything else seems like bog standard ARPG fare, it simply doesn't feel good to play. Studio is known for putting out tons of AA shovelware. Of all the ARGS I've played, it reminds me most of "Van Helsing" with a skin of "Lost Ark". I fucking hate "Van Helsing" and "Lost Ark".

Metal Bringer (already out)
ALPHAWING Inc.
I hope you brought your Anti-Aliasing goggles, because this game tries very hard to be retro. Rogue-lite, twin-stick, mech-building, pixel-shaded 64-bit game with an 8-bit soundtrack. It's all meshed together... not all too well. Maybe it requires a more patient approach than what I'm capable to offer, but I always felt limited by the low field of vision and lower energy reserves, making for a very claustrophobic experience. The game is rendered in high enough resolution, but the pixel filter applied to it makes things difficult to make out instead of just making it look "extra-retro". Got killed by a single hit from the first boss, so I assume it requires a lot of grinding.

Mech Havoc
Mid Development
Pretty robust top-down mech game with a choice of piloting mechs, tanks and "I'm fast as fuck, boi" armed cars. Tech trees unlocks, upgrade and side-grade weapons with the important properties listed right these so you can plan accordingly. Maps get reused with different objectives, so sometimes you just need to obliterate key objects and enemies at a base and other times you'll have to mark and secure assets at that same base. Light structure destruction going on, so while I don't believe mountains and big natural rock formations can be affected, you can definitely make a new entrance in a structure if the main doorway is giving you trouble. 

Anoxia Station
Yakov Butuzoff
Simplified turn-based LEGO Rock Raiders made by a slav couple. Oozing atmosphere, maybe a little too much. What is it with russians and their obsession with raindrops on your screen? HighFleet was like this, at least you can turn these effects down. Some effects will still overwhelm you, like whenever a giant creatures emerges on the field, you have to suffer through a deflated jumpscare sequence where the camera keeps zooming in and out really fast. Every sound effect is hanging around thrice as long as it should. I guess it makes sense to have a long echo in the underground cave system, but it really bothered me. The game itself is like a mix of Rock Raiders and Darkest Dungeon. The longer you drill and the more structures you construct, the more they drain on your resources, which you're meant to juggle with the help of said structures and specialists you employ. It's really quite engaging and I hope the couple working on this project see their game flourish.

Haste (already out)
Landfall
Developed and published by the same studio that brought us ClusterTruck and Totally Accurate Battle Simulator, Haste is a Sonic simulator focused on maintaining your momentum and not running into shit. You're tasked with navigating, what I assume are, randomly generated sky islands and collecting as many gems as possible. Surprisingly, you can't jump in this game, so you rely on running up ramps and landing at appropriate angles to clear bottomless gaps. The more good landings you make, the more you charge up your hoverboard, which gives you a bit of a speed boost. Which seems like a snowball effect that rolls both ways. Between some levels you'll run into a shop where you can spend collected currency on usable items like health potions and passives. After about a dozen or so levels you'll face a boss, which breaks up the slightly samey levels. You can choose to rush through challenge levels for some extra cash, but they can be unforgiving. One mistake and you're rushed to the map screen. Characters are over-designed, but the core gameplay is solid, hopefully it's more fleshed out in the full version.
Replies: >>274974 >>274984
>>274941
>very pixelated graphics
>look like an oil painting
>what I'm capable of offering
>the more they drain your resources {there's no "on" afaik}
Minimal typos this time, proud of you demo man.
By the way did you manage to streamline the micro reviews design?
Replies: >>275092
>>274941
total ratte love
that is all
Replies: >>275052
>>274984
Misread this as
>total rattle love
And thought you wanted to fuck a skeleton girl or something
Replies: >>275055 >>275063
>>275052
inb4 someone writes a romcom anime plot for this.
Replies: >>275063
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>>275052
>>275055
Skeleton girls need love too!
Replies: >>275075
>>275063
I think there is only ONE game were you can marry a qt skeleton girl.
Pretty fucking cool you guys made these. Even when 4chan is back up Im gonna keep coming back just to read these.
Replies: >>275242
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>>274974
thanks, it helps to drink less during the writing process
and no, haven't streamlined the micro reviews, that's a bridge over the river Kwai I'm still hesitant to cross.

>>275051
pic related
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>>275085
>>266053 (OP) 
This is great, anon. Also love Vela's nopan crotch.
How come issue number 9 is not yet on https://archive.org/details/SleepyStation  ?
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