>>281
Good point. I am not like that anymore, though. I realized that society is awful and that normalfags are awful, and that society's standards are not only arbitrary, but harmful, and that what I want not only has nothing at all do to with what society wants, but is in actual conflict with it. Everything that society praises is stupid, inefficient, generally harmful, boring, and a lot of the time actually disgusting. Not only am I different from them, the environment that they created is hostile to my very existence.
I also realized that there is no reason to be ashamed of being who I am because there is nothing wrong with it, and I should be transparent and honest because if other normalfags don't like who I am stay away from me, that is nothing but beneficial. It can only make my life easier and better and only people that do like me will remain. Of course, this hasn't been used in practice because I am still a hikki, but one day it will, if I manage to recover and actually do what I know I want to do. The difficult part is that I still have to deal with society a little bit if I want to get away from it. The world's current situation is making that very difficult, especially when I can see the shady and evil things that are going on, and refuse to go along with them.
Anyway, my goal is not to join society, because I know that it will never work, and that it's evil. Its goal is clearly enslavement, and I can see right through it. My goal is to get away from it, and to be independent from it. After years of isolation, I realized why I was never able to adapt and to fit in, what makes me different, how I have been wronged and how cancerous society actually is, and realized what I want and should do. Also what I have to do, because I can see how authoritarian the world has become, and can see that it will probably become much worse.
Oh, and the Unabomber was definitely correct about most of what he said. Technology can be very positive, but corporations and central authorities tend to always corrupt it. I grew up online, and in a way, the internet is my homeland. There was never a place or culture for me in the real world, but I had that online. Over time, I watched its corruption and destruction, and it was taken away from me. It was destroyed by reality, and then used to destroy reality itself. Now I have nothing and even the real world seems less hopeless than the internet. I wish I could at least have access to some of the nicer people that I talked to online in real life. That seems unlikely, but maybe it will occur as the world forces many of us to run away from society, and particularly from the oppression and chaos of urban life. I don't care about money, but in a way I wish I could care so I could use it to help people out. But that would require some compatibility with society, and I do not have that. Maybe at least some greed would help, but I don't have that either.