/hikki/ - Hikikomori

The modern hermit

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A continuation of the old thread on the old board. How far did you get before abandoning everything? 
I was never able to finish my first year of high school before dropping out until I was forced in my early 20s to going to night school to get a diploma before cutting off everything completely.
Replies: >>420
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I lasted a few months in university but it was too much for me
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I had a psychotic break at 18 and while I've never had such a thing happen again the past 6 years, I've never fully recovered.
I think I will be a hikikomori for the rest of my life. I am so terrified of the outdoors.
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you are an ex-hikki at best let's be real here
Replies: >>308
Yeah I don't consider myself one anymore, but is there anything that states that a hikki can't have income without leaving their domicile? Not hikki-neet, just hikki.
Replies: >>329
>t is there anything that states that a hikki can't have income without leaving their domicile? Not hikki-neet, just hikki.

>The Japanese Ministry of Health, Labour, and Welfare defines hikikomori as a condition in which the affected individuals refuse to leave their parents' house, do not work or go to school and isolate themselves away from society and family in a single room for a period exceeding six months.[10] The psychiatrist Tamaki Saitō defines hikikomori as "a state that has become a problem by the late twenties, that involves cooping oneself up in one's own home and not participating in society for six months or longer, but that does not seem to have another psychological problem as its principal source".[

Finished college. Worst years of my life. 
I despise working together with people, and dear god there are way too many courseworks that force you to work in a group. 
After doing my internship, I realize how much I have to socialize in a work place. I can't see myself doing that shit for 40 years till retirement.
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After getting my GED, I enrolled in community college. Dropped out a year into it. Been fucked ever since. I envy the ones who stayed the course, have gotten degrees and were able to find jobs. They'll never truly know the pain of defeat.
>Dropped out second time through freshman year of high school, skipped enough to be held back, got GED two months later. 
>Sequestered myself at grandmother's house until mid-20's when she got dementia.
>Lived with mother after that but she was dealing with abusive ex. Did that for 2 years.
>Now late-20's and with my mother crashing at relative's place until we secure a place to live after moving out of state.

The last 15 years of my life have been spent in a room shut off from the outside, I rarely if ever ventures out of my room unless I needed something or to use the bathroom. That doesn't look like it will change, being honest I don't want it to.
The last 5 years have been an emotional hell. Even with an unstable living arrangement these days it's better than what it was. Unfortunately I still have a detached connection to it but that's an unfixable aspect of my self. I feel mostly numb, emotions have always been difficult for me, most of the time I simply act in a manner deemed appropriate and attempt to disengage at the earliest opportunity.
Taking pills to try to manage the depression and overwhelming anxiety but all they do is put me in a fog. My thoughts are hazy and my brain is full of cotton balls. I have trouble concentrating. My internal dialogue is far away, it come intermittently. I've never felt more alone because of it.
Not far. I stopped going to school when I was 15 and I have been a NEET ever since. I have no GCSEs (I'm British, obviously), no work experience, I don't know anybody within a 5 hour drive radius and I haven't spoken to the people I do know in several years. I'm pretty sure I have schizophrenia or something similar too. I'm probably going to kill myself soon.
>>178 (OP) 
High school, when the time came to choose which career i wanted to pursue i simply opted to drop out and live off my parents, worked surprisingly well (house was inherited from my grandparents, i am an only child) until quite recently when everyone got laid off due to the fucking chinese. Now we have to make do with our savings and what my father earns with his new job (mom wasn't able to find another one), meaning i can no longer "borrow" $100+ a week to purchase shit off the internet.

Terrible timing for it too, as my computer broke down half a year ago (power surge fried basically everything, even the monitor) and instead of replacing it i opted to buy a thinkpad to "learn" linux (which i didn't, it's running W10 LTSC), my TV started malfunctioning too, though to be fair it was rather old. I have a lot of things i need right now, so i might no longer be a NEET in a few weeks, and i'll have to slave away in bottom of the barrel jobs since no one sane would hire a 26 year old with no experience.
GED at 17, life was okay for awhile, mental breakdown at 25, live on bux now and life is beautiful. I've got maybe 3 years total work experience and I'm almost 30. If they ever cut me off bux that's when I will abandon everything
I've only worked a few months in my life, but that was about decade ago.
People are too terrible, and I have nothing to drive me to go outside.
I dropped out of college after a few weeks. I worked about 5 months in a supermarket packing juice onto shelves. Lost a lot of weight, and if it weren't for the incredibly terrible co-workers, bosses and customers, then it could've been a decent job. I lost a ton of weight in those few months, but gained it, and more, back.

Every one of my futures was taken away from me, and now I cope with God and hope He comes to fetch me soon.
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